Archive for August, 2012

I’ve had a chance over the past two weeks to start collecting a Warhammer 40K ork army, beginning with two mobs of ork boyz(20 boys total, which will be combined into one mob of shoota boys), and a metal warboss with a twin-linked shoota and big choppa.  I had wanted to collect an ork army for the longest time, simply to paint and model, because orks have always been one of my favorite armies in the Warhammer universe, but I’d put off the army for a really long time.  Finally, I decided that it was time to start collecting, even if I won’t play for a long, long time.

The older metal warbosses and nobs(ork nobles) in particular had always appealed to me, so when I found a new-in-blister ork warboss on Ebay for $9+shipping, I jumped on it.  I’ve decided that the army will be a mix of Bad Moons and Death Skulls, whose colors are yellow and blue, respectively.  It should look great on the tabletop, when everything is said and done.

If you’ve been following my blog, you know that my warboss is Uzdreg da Bloo Bearded, who got a hair squig stuck to his face and earned the admiration of the Death Skulls that snuck aboard his space hulk.  I’ve modeled the beard onto the warboss’ head with green stuff, and I’m excited to see it painted and done.  The body of Uzdreg is also slowly getting finished, and I like how the skin and armor turned out.

The yellow Bad Moon armor is done in a series of consecutively lighter brown coats, starting with P3 Battlefield Brown and ending in several washes of GW Yriel Yellow.  It’s going to take me forever to paint all the ork boyz.  But the end result will be stunning, I think.


Check out the pictures:


This is Uzdreg and the ladz.


It’s hard to make out, but here is Uzdreg and his beard.


Body of Uzdreg with a boy next to him for comparison. Warbosses are ‘uge!


And finally, Uzdreg’s choppa arm and some of the body armor he’s wearing.






A troop of boyz had come back to the hulk’s crash site with good news; there was a humie settlement nearby!  There had been resistance, and the orks had returned to Uzdreg to report and bring back more dakka.  A fight was just what was needed, so Uzdreg grabbed his retinue of nobs, along with a few of the ladz, and moved out.  He didn’t trust those superstitious Death Skullz, so they were the ones that got to come along.  If a few of them got killed, so much the better.  They were all weedy gits anyway…

The space hulk had left a wide swath of trees tumbled, broken, on fire, and devastated, so that was the way they went to start off.  Orgrash said that the town was a ways off, and had a wall around it.  That was fine; they had stuff to take care of the wall.  Uzdreg grinned and swung his big choppa at a tree.  The whirring teeth in the blade bit and chewed through the trunk with ease.  Maybe the humies had never encountered the orks before.  His ladz were monsters, killers every one, and were always spoiling for a fight.  This had better be a good one.  A scuffle broke out in the ranks, and one of the nobs smashed heads to keep order.

Uzdreg thought it was important to keep the boyz in the fight whenever he could; bad things happened when there wasn’t enough fighting to be done.  His Bad Moons had been doing just fine, and then they’d discovered Death Skulls freeloaders on the hulk while they were in transit.  Some of the nobs were all for throwing the lot of them out of the airlocks, but bigger fists prevailed in the end, and the gits got to stay.  The way Uzdreg saw it, they were cannon fodder for the front lines when the fightin’ got serious.  Of course, this backwater planet was pretty empty so far, but that could change.  All he needed to do was get a big enough Waaagh going, and the humies would come to him by the thousands.  After he took care of those, all that was left was regaining space and finding even more places and planets to bash heads.  Think ahead to the next fight, that was the warboss’s job.  Uzdreg was good at that.  His ladz often said that he had the cunnin’ as well as the fightin’.

Orgrash was good at navigatin’, and the squad soon made it to the walled town.  Uzdreg eyed the place under cover of the trees.  Lots of activity.  It looked like the humies were preparing after last night’s raid from his boyz.  A few pieces of dakka were set up along the walls, and the gates were barred shut.  They were made of thick iron, good for holding off shoota fire but not much else.  The walls were only about 10 feet high – not enough to stop a determined ork, not with the power klaws that several of his nobs carried.   Uzdreg signalled to the ladz, indicating that the Death Skulls go in from the front, and his nobs near the back.  He waited several minutes for everyork to get into position, and then joined his Bad Moons.  Snagrot flexed his klaw, and blue flickers of power licked along the vicious blades.  He was ready.  Uzdreg took careful aim with his big shoota, and pulled the trigger.  A burst of shells annihilated the gun emplacement on the rear town wall, and with a throaty “WAAAAGHH” everyone charged.

Snagrot was first at the wall, with Krashnak right beside him.  They were experienced veterans, and their klaws quickly tore a gaping hole in the wooden palisade.  The duo pushed through, opening fire immediately on anything that moved.  From the town’s front gate, loud gunfire erupted as the Death Skulls made their own charge.  A lot of humies were screaming, the sound almost covered by the deeper ork battle cries and the enormous volume of shoota fire.

Uzdreg entered the nameless town with his nobs, and the brutes spread apart to sow chaos and terror.  Uzdreg stalked between two pre-fab houses, rounding the corner just in time to meet a squad of soldiers coming the other way.  Shocked, they took seconds too long to react as his orky instincts took over, and the big choppa scythed through cloth, flesh, and bone.  The gun in his other hand fired at point blank range, and two more soldiers disintigrated under a hail of bullets.  One of the humies dropped his weapon and ran, and Uzdreg let him go.  He’d learned decades ago that if you let some of them live, more would back for the fight later.  That was all part of his cunnin’ plan – his Death Skulls had orders to let some of the humies escape and make their way out.  They would spread word to other settlements that the ork tide was coming, and return with more men, weapons, and vehicles for the looting.

A few blocks down, a garage door clattered open, and a large flat-bed truck gunned to life, gaining speed as it roared toward the town gates.  The ork warboss grinned.  Everything was going according to Da Plan.  He called out a “Waaaagh” to let the boyz know, and flicked his choppa to whirring life to get the blood and bone off the grinding teeth.  He couldn’t wait to see what came back.




The hulk had crashed into the foothills bordering the northern mountain range, carving a huge swath of pine forest into kindling on the way to its final resting place amidst the shale and granite outcroppings that eventually rose to form an ancient barrier on the continent’s northwestern edge.  Sporadic fires lit the night as spilled fuel continued to burn.  The flames gave enough light to show dozens of hulking figures scrambling over the wrecked ship, accompanied by the sounds of groaning metal as sheets of plating were ripped off the structure.  Smaller shapes hurried through the crash site, picking over debris and gathering scraps and pieces into haphazard piles.  Snow fell in lazy spirals.


Uzdreg watched, arms crossed.  The nobz behind him were silent, for once.  The crash hadn’t been in the plan.  Not this time.  The mekboyz weren’t sure yet what had gone wrong, and the replacement mekboy was still figuring things out after his superior had Uzdreg’s choppa buried in his skull.  At least a lot of the boyz had made it out, and Uzdreg reckoned that he had enough krump with him to start a decent brawl if he wanted to.  He’d already told some of the ladz to go lookin’.  Gretchin workers were busy chopping trees and starting a watch tower, but Uzdreg was ready to bash more heads, and a fight was all he wanted.


The (old) plan had been to find a good humie world, start bashin’, and see how much fightin’ and killin’ the ladz could get done before the uniforms and the tanks showed up.  After that, the real brawl would get started, and then Uzdreg would have his day.  The (new) plan was a lot like the old one.  Except they had to find some humies, first.  And get more ladz.  That might take a while; the hulk had scattered ork corpses across the expanse of forest that lined this part of whatever world this was.  Enough had made it out alive to start some good fightin’, but it wasn’t enough numbers yet.  Uzdreg couldn’t count very high, but he knew that instinctively.


Everyone could tell that Uzdreg was in a bad mood.  He didn’t like when the plan went wrong, and this one couldn’t have gone wronger.  After he finished his rage and bashed some heads in, he’d gone all quiet, and that was when the nobz got worried.  Uzdreg was never quiet, and when he was, bad things happened.  The night passed slowly, and the work progressed.  The boss didn’t move, so neither did his retinue.  They watched in silence as the tower went up, and anything and everything useful was stripped from the wreckage of the space hulk.


An engine backfired, and the one working trukk the boyz had tore forward through the trampled snow and mud.  The chains attached to its bumper went taut, and ever so slowly the shape of a deff dread emerged from the side of the hulk.  One of the walker’s legs was missing, and the mekboy that followed it outside had the appendage clamped in the robotic arm that emerged from the contraption strapped to his back.


Shouts and hollers erupted from the forest as dawn broke over the crash site, and a crew of shoota boys trampled their way through to Uzdreg.  “Boss, we got some good news.  You’re gonna like this,” the biggest of them growled, and raised a muscled arm.  Clenched in his bloody fist, held by the hair, was a human head.  “We had some bashin’ to do, and there’s gonna be lots more of it!”


Uzdreg just grinned.